Friday, December 27, 2013

Still not sure what to do

Didn't start today. Woke up weighed in at 182.8. I'm not surprised at that at all. I was kind of expecting it and I am now even more unsure of what to do and feeling more and more panicked about it.  I was looking at what my future holds if things don't change and it is; type 2 diabeties, dentures, depression, anxiety, low sex drive, low self esteem, winkles and living in constant pain and exhaustion.  Everyone on my dad's side has type 2 diabeties. My dad and my uncle have both lost most of their teeth after years of no cavities. My dad just got complete top dentures and can finally eat again. While I sell the best skin car in the world I don't make time to use it everyday  and if that isn't a priority I will end up wrinkly. And walking to and from my car at work which includes some stairs has me out if breath and my body has random  aches all the time.  I just want to aka sure I am set up for success and I feel so sick almost everyday I am afraid to start something new and taking vitamins and such. Right now I feel very nauseated and there are so many flus going around that I stress cause if I get it that  means the rest of the house will probably get it.  However I look also at my BIL and his family his kids and him always seem to have some kind if flu. I kid you not every time we see the w/ in 25 hrs someone is puking or had a fever and I don't think it is possible to have the flu that often. DH and I are 99% sure they all suffer from some food allergy and that is what is causing the reactions. So with that logic I ow the fact that I do 't feel well isrobw ly more to do with being unhealthy than having a flu.

I so desperately want to start tomorrow and get going and in the same breath I am scared and feel unprepared still. 

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