I have been researching and researching. Trying to find the perfect combination of things for my diet that I want to start tomorrow. I've looked at Advocare's 24 day challenge, medifast prepackaged food program, LA weight loss at home, weight watchers, carb cycling.......... STOP IT!!! My mind is just going on and on about options. What diet should I follow? Should I get a personal trainer? I am borderline terrified to start this time around and I'm not sure why. Is it the fear of failing again? Is it because if feels so final this time, like this is it, I am really going to change my life and I am not fond of change?
I am afraid to step on the scale and see my starting weight. I've been eating A LOT!! I am sure I am at least at my highest of 181 or maybe a little higher. We didn't make it to the grocery store so I am not even prepared to start tomorrow like I've been planning. I am not sure if I should just go w/ it and eat what I think will be good tomorrow. I think I have at least one day of diet food in this house. But dinner could be tricky. If I could get through tomorrow then I could buy myself until Saturday to go grocery shopping and finish my meal plan. But then do I start the Advocare cleanse or just start taking vitamins?? I really fell like I should do the cleanse cause I feel sick 90% of the time. I mean my body feels like it is begging me to stop eating junk and crap. I am always tired and finding more aches and pains daily. My XL clothing isn't fitting. So do I jump in w/o a plan or do I wait another day to fine tune my plan and figure out what I am going to do.
It comes down to the fact that there is no one plan that gives me everything I want. I want my plan to include set meals w/ less options (at least until the bad habits are broken), eating as clean and organic as possible, use my body media arm band, track what I am eating w/o tracking calories. Calories have always stressed me out. I can eat healthy all day & find out I am way over my calories. The problems w/ what I want is if I am not tracking calories wearing my arm band is pointless because I won't be able to see my calorie deficit. Prepackaged food would b a great way for me to have set meals w/ less options but then they are very processed and then I am not eating clean or organically. I keep going back to the Advocare thing cause it tells me what to eat but it is kind of like the LA weight loss. Eat a protein and a complex carb for this meal. To use my body media band I will have to input what I ate and that will put the calories attached to it. I am stressing my self out about this. I feel like if I don't start tomorrow I've already failed but the reason I am researching so much is because I want to set my self up for success by making sure it is something I can stick to & I haven't even figured out my goal for completing my first 10 days yet.
Disneyland & my 34th birthday is only 9 weeks away. *sigh*
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