Wednesday, February 29, 2012

P.M.S (Pretty Much Shocked)

I am in complete shock! So not only did this complete day 3 w/o Chocolate or Diet Pop but I started my period today.  So normally the week before my period I am gorging on Chocolate we are talking Massive quantities.  And I haven't had any for 3 days!!!!  It makes me feel empowered. I feel like WOW! I thought my period must have been further out like next week. My craving for chocolate has been pretty bad today but I was able to put aside a fun size bag of M&M's today.  I feel like I can really do this. We went grocery shopping tonight & got a bunch for fruits & veggies & I feel like things are going good. I am not stressing about things but I am also not dieting yet hoping that this whole changing my eating habits a little slower is actually working!!!  I am packing my lunch for tomorrow & hoping to do really well. Nights are still hard because that is when I like to snack but I am choosing not to snack on Chocolate & the Diet Pop out of there seems to be making it SO much easier not to snack it is crazy!!!

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Day 2 w/o Chocolate or Diet Pop...

Oh my head hurt more than 1/2 the day.  I had a Coke to get the caffein in me & that made the head ache go away. I really would love to go to the gym tomorrow but it is so hard to find time.  DH signed up to ride the STP (Seattle to Portland) Bike ride.  So we have our regular jobs, the boys, my new business, DH training for the STP & I feel like because of my new business I can't ask for time to go to the gym.  I am still not attempting to diet yet because of the cutting out chocolate. However it is going much easier than I expected it to.  I mean I really, REALLY want some but I am just able to say no.  How my mind got set I'll never know.  I know that I am sick of being over weight & of how it effects not only me but those I love around me.  I tried to take a nice pic of my self for my business website & I couldn't take one that I thought I looked nice in.  DH said he wants a family pic for his desk & we don't have any professional pics since DS1 was 9 months old. I would LOVE a new pic. We never got around to getting a nice one taken while at Disneyland in Dec so I was thinking Mothers Day would be a great time to get them done.  It would be close enough to the boys birthdays that we can get those shots done too.  The only thing is I always take their pics w/ my Nikon. So I don't know if I would try to have my Brother take them or if we would pay out of pocket for them.  But If I started loosing weight now @ 2 lbs a week that would be 20 lbs before Mothers day I would feel GREAT getting pics 20 lbs lighter.  The last two days I am still eating sugar in place of the chocolate but no where near the amounts.  This mornings weigh in was 169. I will check in tomorrow. :-)  Feeling pretty good tonight maybe tomorrow I will get to the gym & start eating right.  Lets see if my brain will turn that into a decision not just wishful thinking.

Monday, February 27, 2012

Will this be how the cookie crumbles??

Well hello.  Here were are 11 months from my first entry. Just think of how much weight you could lose in 11 months!!! Even if we say we only lose 1/2 lb a week that is 22 lbs.  1/2 a lb a week anyone can lose 1/2 a lb a week, right?  However I am here to say I am still overweight.  Last weigh in a few days ago was at 169. While my DH was away in Barbados, back in Oct.  I missed him so much I could hardly eat. By the time he came home I was down to 158 & had to buy new jeans cause nothing fit.  In less than 2 weeks I was back up to 164.  I realized something in the last 6 months. I have always said French Fries were my weakness they are truly not.  It is chocolate & sweets & I know your all thinking well isn't every bodies?  But I have a real problem I can't stop eating them. I will shove candy after candy in my mouth through out the day & not even think about it.

I am very thankful that God has blessed me w/ a well paying job but the job makes me miserable & I find my only escape to be eating. So I will go buy a bag of reeses miniature cups, trees, hearts, eggs & can eat the whole bag during my shift.  I am just confessing the amount of chocolate I've been consuming over the last 3 months to my DH & SIL.  DH had no idea it was that bad.  So starting today I am not dieting. I am only trying to cut the chocolate out.  I have done this before.  When I first found out I was severally lactose intolerant I stopped everything w/ dairy but then after a year I found I could tolerate some.  So I am proud to say that today was a successful day!! No chocolate & I even still had it left at my desk & I didn't touch it. Another key part to this is giving up my Diet pop.  I LOVE DIET POP!! I have been drinking it as long as I can remember. I think it taste better & it makes food & sweets taste better. The real cause of this is the aspartame.  Aspartame not only keeps your feeling less full, (for example when I feel like I can't eat another bit I know if I go get a can of diet pop to go along w/ my food or dessert I will be able to finish it.) it also makes your body think it is getting sugar so when your body never gets something to process like sugar you then crave it.  My DH has wanted me to stop drinking Diet Pop for years but I've just haven't been willing to give it up.  But I find it hard to eat sweets w/o it now & because that is my gluttonous weakness I am going to try to put it aside as well.

I am hoping this is the start of something positive.  I have recently also started a small business as an Independent Mary Kay Consultant & I am planing on it being my way out of my current job situation. :-)  Hopefully my next post won't be