Now even though I know this is what is meant to be and we are doing what God wants us to do, my stress is through the roof!!! I've always heard that moving is one of the most stressful things you will ever do in your life and oh my goodness they were not kidding. It is such a delicate balance of everything having to work out perfectly on both sides. Between the stress of the waiting for things to fall into place, planning the move, packing and today we decided we need to have a moving sale, I eat. We honestly eat out 95% of the time and that includes some form of ice cream almost every night. Hubby has reached his highest weight ever and I'd been avoiding the scale. This morning I steaped on the scale and actually gasped. I saw a number I have NEVER seen on the scale before, 185! I quickly took it again to see a 183.8 but the 185 is ringing so loud and clear. And this is naked weight. Weight in at WW would be even higher. I sit all the time and have zero activity.
This last weekend running was everywhere I turned. Friday at work my friend who runs asked me if I was running the Hot Chocolate this weekend and I told him no but I do want to do that again because I didn't get to complete it. Then BFF did do the Hot Chocolate and on our way back from the ocean we stopped at BFF's son's B-day party and there was a girl there that just got back from running the Princess in WDW and she is going to do the Avengers Half in Disneyland later this year and earn her coast to coast. I had already spent the last day of vacation writing a journal page about my health and lack of activity and all this really amplified it. Because I do this to my self I feel no right to complain about any of it. The strange and unfortunate side effect of owing your mistakes and not talking about them to other people you don't get the you can do it's and encouragement that can be so vital to success. And it is so easy to sulk and wallow. Why is that always the easiest thing to do? Things in our life are going so great, yes there is stress but normal stress that comes with moving. I told myself today I can't possibly even think about dieting until after we move and that was followed by WOW that is such a lame excuse. Followed by more excuses about how I won't have time to eat healthy, how we are just SO busy trying to start dieting again is just to much to try to take on. I know I should start eating healthy and my C25K this week but I honestly don't know what is going to happen.
10 years ago yesterday I walked into LA weight loss with my Mom and my SIL and we signed up! My Mom fell off the band wagon pretty quick but my SIL and I ate together almost 5 nights a week for the next 6 months. Literally my Brother and his family were over for dinner all the time. This made sticking to the LA weight loss plan a breeze. By our trip to Disneyland that September I had lost just about 30 lbs and had hit 140 lbs. Still about 15 lbs from a "healthy" weight but I was happy and felt great!
10 years ago yesterday I made a change and stuck to it and changed my life, for a little while. One year later I started slowly gaining and then before you know it here I am at 185 lbs. How did I stick to it 10 years ago? It was the buddy system and not just a check in it was the fact I was eating with my weight loss buddy almost everyday. Hubby wants to be my new weight loss buddy but just the thought of that makes me angry knowing how fast he will lose weight and how painfully slow my weight loss always is. I currently have permanent glasses lines on the side of my fat head from where my glasses sit. My legs and hips ache, my heartburn and blood pressure is horrible. I am literally only years away from type 2 diabetes. My BP has been so high my OBGYN was worried at my apt last month. I know the only way to make this change is to do it. All success stories start with after trying and trying I finally just stopped trying and did it. I feel that trying is pointless anymore because it always ends in failing.
"Try not, Do or do not. There is no Try" -Jedi Master Yoda